Abandon Buildings

At site there are LOTS of abandon buildings! These buildings have become one of my greatest obsessions! Some of them are boarded up and difficult to get into, others are fairly easy and it’s suspected that people who are homeless live here. Unsure of whether or not we would be breaking some unknown law about entering abandon buildings, my site mate and I decided to venture into the abandon apartment building near his house. There really is ABSOLUTELY nothing left in these buildings except rubble. We walked into different apartments and attempted to read the graffiti on the walls, evidence that someone had been here. Some areas clearly had people living in them, as they had a “bathroom corner” and what appeared to be a “bed” where someone most likely slept. The building had five floors and as we ascended the building we became a bit more fearful that the people who lived there would be home or would be coming home, but still, we pressed on. Of course, floor 4 was not that different than floor 1. One particular apartment in the building had been cleaned out; it lacked the rubble that had been present in all the other apartments and had something that resembled that of a table. It was then that I felt like I was actually in someone else’s house.

It seems like a hopeless situation; no job, no money, no family, no where to live, nothing, yet they continue to wake up in the morning with the sunrise, go somewhere to get what they need and return to what they most likely refer to as “home.” They find the hope they need to continue doing what they do. I wanted to help them, but quickly realized they don’t need my help, but rather, I need to learn from them. I want that kind of hope they seem to have, no one was home and I didn’t speak with any of them, these are purely my observations. The hope of getting out of bed in the morning and expecting something better than I got the day before, or just the simple act of “going through the motions” even through the “dark times;” of waiting.

In America there are shelters, welfare, soup kitchens, and other programs for people who lack money. I haven’t seen a homeless shelter here in Kaz and don’t know about the welfare system? I can’t even begin to imagine the challenges of being poor in a developing country. Sitting at rock bottom everyday, knowing that things can only go up and hoping for something more, only to return “home” to the abandon building where one has staked his claim, the smell of feces radiates over the small space where one sleeps atop the rubble; then to have to power to get up and do it again the following day is something I don’t know that I will ever understand. What I do know is that I will be more compassionate to the beggar in the bazaar.