Adjusting my expectations

As a sophomore in high school everything was a BIG deal – it’s often very funny to think about the things that mattered SO much then, but have very little importance now. For example:
Who will my locker partner be?
What will I wear to school?
Who will I get ready for Homecoming with?
Who will I go to Homecoming with?
What if my friends are not in my classes?
Who will I sit near?
I’m sure there are MANY more examples of trivial things that mattered then, but have little relevance now – I mean who REALLY remembers (or cares) who they sat next to in 3rd period sophomore year – I don’t even remember what 3rd period was! J

During one of my many crises at 16 years old – I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about – I found myself sitting in my Youth Pastor’s office complaining, I’m sure about something that would not matter the next week or most likely even the next day, but it was a BIG deal! My Youth Pastor, bless his heart, uttered these words to me, “Christina, maybe the reason people let you down, is because you expect too much from them.” Those words were probably of little use to me at 16 when the WHOLE world was against me and maybe I even argued that it wasn’t true, but those same words have stuck with me for the last eight years and will, I’m sure, be with me for the rest of my life.

In Kazakhstan, I often remind myself of these words and wonder, ‘Am I expecting too much?’ and maybe I am. I have realized that I expect a lot of things from people. I expect people to want to come to English club, to want to learn, to want to be my friend, to try and understand me and more than anything else I expect that people would be patient with my language ability – or inability rather. I expect all of these things and I am the foreigner. This leads me to wonder what I expect from a foreigner in America, which now looking at it from the other side, is FAR too much. Should I not be held to the same standard I expect? I think I should be. I also think I should keep my expectations in check – all things will come with time – I should not expect less, but my expectations should be realistic.

I can’t tell you what could have possibly been the problem on this day, one of the many problems we all have at 16. I also don’t know what else was said during this meeting. I used to think these words were a curse; they come to mind at the most inconvenient times, generally when I don’t want them to, because I’m irritated by something or someone…but maybe these words are actually a blessing? As they force me to stop and check my expectations and consider whether or not I’m expecting more from people than they are able to give me…it’s worth a thought…Thanks Nate!