Advice for Travellers

My weeks here continue to move rather quickly! Of course, I think the next few will slow down as I count down until I get to see all my AMAZING Peace Corps friends at the end of March!! WOO! WOO!

Now for all of you preparing to go somewhere by train – or just for your reading enjoyment:

How to Pee on the Train
1. Bring your own toilet paper – this will not be supplied
2. Lock the door behind you – this will take about 2 minutes as you figure out how the stupid thing locks and you
do this while you’re on a moving train and the door refuses to even stay closed!
3. Stand on the toilet seat and squat – you don’t sit on the toilet seat on the train – you stand – there’s a spot for
your feet
4. Pee – try to keep your balance – should you fall, it will probably hurt, your pants are around your ankles and it
will be difficult to “catch yourself” – not to mention – you’re peeing!
5. Use the toilet paper and stand up – keep your balance as you pull your pants up and jump down from the toilet
seat
6. Next you will spend approximately 3 minutes figuring out how to turn the water on – yes, there is a faucet –
you’re 3 minutes will be a waste of your life as you realize the water doesn’t actually work – hopefully, you
have also brought hand sanitizer with you – or your own bottle of water…this will be “good enough” until you
get somewhere you can “really” wash your hands
7. To flush press the lever on the bottom of the toilet
8. You will spend the next 2 minutes feeling like you’re trapped as you try to unlock the door – the same door
that took you 2 minutes to figure out how to lock
9. Leave the bathroom – proud of yourself – as if it was the first time you went to the bathroom in the “big girl
potty” – this is a great accomplishment! You should most likely reward yourself with candy :-)

This process will take about 10 minutes as a line gathers outside and you hear people speaking in Russian – these same people have ALL tried to open the door while you were using the bathroom – they obviously didn’t see the line and assume that other people were waiting – there’s no such thing as a line here!

Maybe if you are reading this it doesn’t sound ALL that difficult – let me suggest you get “in position” (squatting on your toilet seat) and have someone shake you from side to side – yea, not so easy huh – peeing on yourself will most likely occur – but at least you tried J

I wish I had pictures of the cramped bathroom on the train! I’ll get them next time!